Earlier on into the genocide & ethnic cleansing of Palestine that is unforgivably continuing today, I happened across some advice from an Indigenous woman who shared the wisdom that if grief is love with nowhere to go, we can take that love and give it somewhere to go.
Very honestly, the reality of the world today is incredibly too much to bear. And yet, we must. We must bear it inasmuch as is possible and we must bear witness to the horrors that "civilized" societies and capitalism are intentionally ignoring at best but in most cases actively facilitating and perpetuating.
Celebrating wins in my own life feels incredibly unfair. I will carry this grief with me forever--the grief of not being able to stop the cruelty and monstrosity committed against Palestinians, the grief of betrayal by the western world that promised "never again" with fingers crossed, the grief of so many swayed by fear and blatant propaganda, the grief of the pro-life community that raised me once again utterly failing to actually fight for human life.
If my grief is big, I promise you my love is that much bigger. And while I make great effort to shine that love outward, for now I am directing some of it inward.
I love myself enough to make progress on my goals, to invest in my life, to be intentional with my time.
And so today, on an unexpected snow day, I invested in bringing my art business to the next level. I checked off things that had gathered years of dust on my to-do list. I found a random smattering of birds (not all ducks by any means) and at least vaguely told them something about forming a sensible geometric shape.
Rather than feeling paralyzed or steeping in despair, I made steps to spend more time bringing my ideas and imagination to life.
If I can put more life and love into a world that desperately needs it, that feels like a win worth noting.
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